Do I really have to go back?

Really do I have to go back to work? I've not had a full night's sleep all holiday due to stressing about work/finances. I just want to cry at the thought of going back into that office tomorrow to an inbox full of emails from members complaining about stuff. No doubt there will be at least one complaint that there were no staff available over the Christmas period or that they sent an email at 7pm on 24th December and had still not received a reply by 9am on 1st Jan.

It doesn't help that I got a "3" which is the managements way of giving me a shit payrise (yes I realise I should be delighted at getting anything - MrT works in the public sector so I've had that whinge a lot). I wouldn't mind if I'd coasted a bit this year but I've worked my arse off, done a million times better than anyone expected and been on the receiving end from much praise from Directors, Council and the MD. But as far as the HR line goes I have achieved my objectives but not exceeded any.

I know that they don't want to give me a payrise as I work in a non-sexy team (ie the one that looks after the members and doesn't get the big boss in the press) and they need to save their budget to get in people with lots of experience in who I then spend months explaining again and again how to do their jobs. TBH the way it looks now I'm not convinced they're even going to get any maternity cover in for me because then they don't have to pay anyone for 6 months. This may seem cynical but they've just given my colleague (she who is BFF of Line Manager) 50% of another role to do and the other 50% of her original role will be mopped up by the rest of us (Line Manager is on the way to a breakdown so won't be able to chip in, New Guy is adorable but ineffective - too busy looking 15 and confused and they've just told us we're not getting a new Grad so it looks like the rest of the team to take up the slack means me!).

Maternity leave a good time to look for a new job? Me thinks YES!